Christmas still sucks
You people are the biggest lot of fucksticks I have ever had the displeasure to know of. Allow me to clarify.
Last
year when I said “Plus it is not like having those shitty hats on is going to make
people buy more.
What I meant to say was “Plus it is not like having those shitty hats on is going to make people with half a functioning brain and a microbe of will power buy more.”
October. Fucking October was when most stores here put up their Christmas decorations. And not this week of October – October fucking 1st is when they went up.
And why did they put them up so early? Because their market research has shown that people spend more when the decorations are up. And why do people spend more when the decorations are up?
BECAUSE THEY ARE STUPID FUCKSTICKS WITH NO FUCKING BRAINS AND EVEN LESS WILLPOWER.
“Oh the decorations are up. I am losing control of my purse. I must now spend $10,000 per week every week until Christmas on stupid shit I don’t need instead of the usual $5000 per week I spend on stupid shit I don’t need”
Is that how it works? Or is that you are just morons who forget what time of year it is and see the Christmas decorations up and say “Oh I need to do my Christmas shopping” so spend all that extra cash, but then because you are morons, you forget and the next time you walk into the store and see the Christmas decorations up you say “Oh I need to do my Christmas shopping” and do your Christmas shopping again?
Stores are there to make money for their shareholders so they are going to do what it takes so I can’t really blame the stores for this. It is you dipshits out there that get sucked in to that bullshit of shitty plastic decorations that are to blame for being so goddamn stupid.
A new dvd comes out that I want it – I buy it. A new game comes out that I want – I buy it. A new book/cd/Yamaha AV Receiver comes out – I buy it – WHEN IT COMES OUT – NOT WHEN THE STORES PUT UP SHITTY DECORATIONS.
The only people who get Christmas presents from me are my significant other, (or women I am trying to convince to become my significant other) my immediate family, and my dogs. The same principle applies with whoever else you buy presents for as with yourself – when you see something they would like then fucking buy it and keep it until Christmas time.
If I had a store I would fuck you dipshits up good. Not only would the Christmas decorations go up, so would the prices of everything in the store – by at least 100%. I will make you spend all your cash so you have none left for food and your mortgage payments and when you default on the mortgage I will buy it up cheap. Then I will bulldoze it and leave a big pile of rubble there. Then I will put a sign up saying something like
“Fucking morons used to live here. They were fucking morons because they had shit for brains and got sucked in to spending more money at stores just because the Christmas decorations were up. Having such little willpower patently shows they are too stupid to be owning a house.”
There would be thousands of these up all over the city which means thousands of dipshits will be homeless and hopefully die out before breeding the next generation of dipshits.
And this Christmas I don’t even have the pleasure of another Lord of the Rings movie to look forward to on Boxing Day......
© by Tiberius Alatheus 2004